Paying the Price |House|

[Dr. Gregory House]

Uncomfortable with his inability to say those three words back to her, he looked down, examining his cane closely. "I know," he muttered. He hoped someday he'd be able to give voice to his thoughts that whirled around, centering on Cuddy. As it was, it was hard to switch off the urge to say something demeaning and sarcastic. That was just how he was. He had strong feelings for Cuddy, loved the intense sex they could give each other... the conversations they could have. The small things, really.

He was confused at Cuddy's question. It was so generic, wide open for interpretation. Too vague. He wasn't sure how to answer it. "I want a lot of things," House said slowly, "you're gonna have to clarify that for me. Pretend I'm not omnipotent. I know it's hard, but just try."

[Dr. Lisa Cuddy]

Cuddy sighed, shaking her head slowly. She'd give him time. Wouldn't force him to do anything he didn't have to do. It didn't matter at the moment, anyway. Some things between them would take time to get used to. Others would come naturally. Apparently, sentiment was something they'd have to work on. But, Cuddy didn't particularly care about that at the moment.

She couldn't hold in a small laugh. "I'll try," she returned. "I meant, do you want a boy or a girl?" She didn't care what he wanted, really, since it didn't necessarily mean that's what they would get, but she was going to get his opinion anyway. Get him involved early on. It was her own subtle way of making sure he didn't leave. Not that she thought he was going to.

[Dr. Gregory House]

House sat back, cane low in his limp hand. Thoughtful expression. He shrugged, "healthy, happy. Anything else is just bonus."

"Funny that." House mused, looking to Cuddy. "The gender thing," House expounded, "since every egg is female. Every fetus starts in that direction, being female. It's only that strange sometime that the Y part of the genetic material sometimes asserts itself to make the fetus male. It's why men have nipples; we started out becoming female. Pleasing, but ultimately useless since we men don't have mammary glands with which to produce milk. Too bad that's all we got; we men could use a little guidance with regards to the feminine mystique."

[Dr. Lisa Cuddy]

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," Cuddy said, not even bothering to waste a glower. "I know all of that. I don't want a medical opinion on this, House." Was it going to be like this the whole time? She hoped not. "I just want some way to refer to it. I don't want to call it a she just because it starts out that way. What do you want it to be in the end?" she clarified, again.

Part of her needed to know, needed House's involvement. Another part said not to push it. "I want you to be honest. As a father, which would you be more comfortable raising?" Cuddy swore to herself that this would be the very last time she asked, regardless of what his answer was this time. They had other things to talk about.

[Dr. Gregory House]

House raised his eyebrows at Cuddy's snippy retort. It was starting. The parasite was altering her body chemistry, causing mood swings. Then he considered it from Cuddy's point of view, which was difficult and ill fitting like an old sweater that you recognize, but don't feel comfortable in anymore. Cuddy had to be feeling no little stress, and a sense that she needed to assert some measure of control over things.

God, there was that father concept again. It amazed him, quite frankly. Even though he knew before Cuddy that he was going to be a father, he hadn't yet adjusted to the idea. In the end, though, House knew he could deal. He just needed time.

She really was making him say it. Cripes.

"Cuddy, I don't care. I would love raising a boy or a girl, because he or she is our child. Comfort really has nothing to do with it. My involvement or caring would be the same if our child happens to be a boy just as much if our kid turns out to be a girl. Really. I mean, I may understand a boy better than I would a girl, sure, but," he shrugged, understanding that Cuddy wasn't comfortable calling her baby an it just because they didn't know the gender yet. "We'll just call our child the baby, the kid, the potential super genius. Do we need anything more?"

[Dr. Lisa Cuddy]

That was it, then. She nodded once, leaning back in her chair. When she'd started trying to get pregnant, she hadn't thought it would be this hard once she'd actually achieved it. She didn't think there would be this much to think about, or talk about. But now that she was pregnant, she had a lot more to think about than she would have liked. And so many of those thoughts were swirling through her mind right now that she didn't know which one to bring up next.

"All right," she answered simply. "I just..." Cuddy sighed, at a complete loss for words. "I don't know what I'm doing," she admitted after a moment. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do now. I don't have the slightest clue how to plan for something like this." She bit her lip, not quite meeting House's eyes. Even knowing that she was being irrational again, she couldn't stop herself from saying what she was. "I don't know what I'm doing," she repeated, finally looking back at him, eyes completely devoid of emotion.

"I don't know what to feel...what to do...what to think..." Bringing her hands up, she pushed her hair back away from her face. She didn't think she was going to get used to these intense mood swings and random periods of irrationality any time soon, and she had a feeling that House probably wouldn't either. "I'm sorry...you probably think I'm pathetic. I'm irrational and moody....and probably annoying you by keeping you here." She started shuffling through the papers lying across her desk, locating the envelope she was looking for. Sliding it across the desk, she glanced up at him again. "I'll understand if you just want to get your check and wait for me to calm down," Cuddy told him truthfully, even though she wasn't entirely sure why she was suddenly okay with him leaving.

[Dr. Gregory House]

House wasn't sure why Cuddy was choosing to fall apart now, but then he reconsidered, realizing that Cuddy was only human. She was pregnant, and feeling the weight of the hospital on her shoulders, and the eventual dependency of her child on her. It would make a lesser man break. Which should speak volumes of Cuddy's control and strength.

"You're strong, Cuddy. You can make it," House said, "I'll be here for you. So will Wilson, even though he's in Maryland now. Sorry. I'm working on it." He knew Cuddy would have bouts of irrationality, of feeling stressed out and everything. "Just, delegate," he suggested, "hire an assistant. No one can do this all on their own. You've been amazing to do as much as you have like this, but it's draining you, killing you by halves. Just think about it, yeah? We have nine months to prepare for the arrival of our super genius."

He pulled the envelope containing his paycheck and tucked it in a pocket. He turned, leaning on his cane. Making his way to the door, he turned back to offer Cuddy a waggle of his eyebrows. Immature of him, but he had to say it. He smirked, "I still can't believe that one of my boys actually got you pregnant. It's the House genes, we're just so virile."

[Dr. Lisa Cuddy]

Cuddy just nodded, knowing how hard it must have been on him to see her go from zero to crazy and back in less than thirty seconds. Then, he was brought into it. Tactfully, she waited until he'd finished reassuring her before speaking.

"You're not calling and telling Wilson, are you?" she asked, hoping against hope that he wouldn't. If she was right in her estimation of the date of conception, it was all Wilson's fault for suggesting the whole thing in the first place. But then...if House hadn't done what he had, she would never have had to take revenge in the first place. By that logic, the fault could equally lie with her for agreeing to Wilson's crazy idea. Cuddy stopped that train of thought; she was confusing herself. It was stupid to place blame on someone for something like this.

Rolling her eyes at his comment, she raised a hand and beckoned to him with one finger. "If you're going to leave, I want something first." She quirked her lips before elaborating. "Would it hurt to give me a kiss goodbye?" Right now, she didn't care how many people were in the clinic just outside her office doors. She just wanted a normal relationship.

[Dr. Gregory House]

House paused in opening the door. He considered slowly, shutting the door firmly. "I won't tell Wilson if you don't want me to. Eventually, you're going to have to tell him that you're pregnant. Wilson's an idiot, but he's not stupid. He's gonna see that you're carrying a p-... baby."

He pulled the blinds shut and hobbled to Cuddy, "why, Cuddy," he teased, "you just can't keep your hands off me, can you? It's all right, I don't mind. Kiss me, you minx." He leaned across the desk, eyes twinkling with mischief.

[Dr. Lisa Cuddy]

Shocked was not a word that Cuddy would have used to describe how she felt right then. 'Surprised', maybe. She was about to say something when a thought struck her. "I won't hold it against you if you tell him," she conceded. "Since one, he'll find out anyway, and two, you tell each other everything. If you tell him, I tell one other person, to keep it fair." She would prefer to not tell anyone, but confronted with the logic that they'd find out anyway, it seemed only right to tell someone.

Cuddy smirked as he closed the blinds. "No, I suppose I can't," she agreed in the same tone. She leaned forward, half-standing from her chair, to meet in the middle. Since the shades were drawn, it was no longer necessary to make this brief. Setting her hands against the desk for support, Cuddy brushed her lips over his before pressing hard. Knowing that this couldn't escalate, not here, she pulled back after a moment. As she resumed her seat, she sent him a look of longing.

"After our date....your place, or mine?" It was worth asking, she thought. And probably a lot more productive than asking where he would be taking her.

[Dr. Gregory House]

"Well, good," House murmured, "Wilson is my friend, and friends shouldn't lie to each other. They frequently do, but they shouldn't. Unless it's a good lie. Though there are differing ideas of what constitutes a good lie as opposed to a bad lie, and I don't mean bad lie as in lying badly. 'Cause if you're lying badly," House stood up, still kind of happy from the kiss, "the person being lied to knows you're lying which makes the whole lying thing kind of moot. Not that I lie badly, in fact I can lie very well." House had his hand on the door, and he paused.

"My place, I think," he said, smirking. "I have the better liquor stock. And XXX tapes." With that, he jauntily waved his cane and exited the office.